Said the esteemed Shaykh and master, “the Bukhari of the Tariqa,” Sidi al-‘Arabi b. al-Sa’ih (God be pleased with him), in Bughyat al-Mustafid:

“In sum, dealings that depend upon recompense are not of the manners of the righteous, but of the habits of the wicked. Nor is it hidden that this courtesy enters into what has been mentioned before by the Shaykh—may God sanctify his secret—and in other of his epistles and counsels. Let each, then, act thereupon according to his power; for God is the Lord of guidance and success.

Among the morals that beget affection and fellowship is likewise the abandonment of affectation between brethren in all that passes between them. For affectation is but a feigned posture before men; and whatsoever is founded upon hypocrisy endures not, but soon decays and turns upon its owner. Hence it is said, “Affectation is backwardness,” [al-takalluf takhalluf] meaning that it falls short of the degree of the sincere; for it is alien to the state of those who are truthful, and contains within it a kind of contention against divine decree and discontent with the portion allotted by the Almighty.

Affectation may appear in clothing—when one wears for the sake of men, and not with a righteous intention; or in speech—when one seeks, in flattery, to please beyond measure, until flattery itself draws him near unto hypocrisy (God forbid). For in the hadith it is said: “Modesty and restraint are two branches of faith; while foulness and excessive eloquence are two branches of hypocrisy.” The learned have explained that “excessive eloquence” here signifies much speech and the striving after artifice in order to please men with flattery and praise and elaborate expression—and such is not the way of the sincere.

Affectation may also appear in the food prepared for guests and the like; yet the chivalrous man (fatā) is he who forsakes affectation, offering simply what is present. Thus are the guest’s arrival and departure alike to him; whereas affectation makes his departure burdensome. And in the hadith it is said: “Among the noble traits of character is visiting one another for the sake of God; and it is the right of the host to set before his brother what is available, even if it be but a draught of water. But if he restrains himself from offering what he has, he remains under God’s wrath day and night.”